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Revived (Unexpected Series Book 1) Page 5
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We visit for the next hour until it’s time to pick Evan and Brady up from the airport. Evan hates flying, so I can only imagine how he did with a toddler in tow.
I spot my son as soon as he and my brother enter the airport. I waste no time running toward them.
“Whoa, sis!” Evan laughs.
“Hi, baby!” I reach for my son, but he lays his head on Evan’s shoulder, unsure of what to do. My heart cracks a little in my chest. Did he forget about me while he was gone?
“Brady, it’s me, Mommy,” I coo at him, hoping he’ll realize who I am. He slowly lifts his head up and takes me in for a minute, right before he starts to cry.
Evan rubs his back and whispers reassuring words in his ear. In the meantime, my heart feels like it’s going to explode. How could I have left my son for so long?
“Claire, he’s been through a lot lately. Just give him time.” Yeah, easy for him to say.
I numbly walk beside Evan and Brady toward the luggage claim. Avery retrieves their bags and then we head toward the parking lot for the lengthy hike back to Avery’s car.
I slide into the backseat by Brady and grab his hand as I scoot next to him in the middle seat.
“Hi, baby,” I whisper at him. He finally gives me a small smile as he grabs onto my thumb with two of his fingers. “I’ve missed you, sweet boy.”
“Mama!” Brady yells after several minutes into our drive. My face immediately breaks out with probably the biggest smile I’ve ever managed to give. With all the hell I’ve faced over the past few months, that’s saying a lot.
“That’s right. I’m your mama.” I lean down to his level and kiss him on his little button nose.
He’s changed quite a bit since the last time I saw him, but only because he’s gotten bigger. Without having access to my phone, I wasn’t able to receive any pictures of him from Trevor. Thanks to Shay, though, I had one picture of him that she snapped at daycare about a month after he got to Chicago. I slept with it under my pillow, counting down the days until I got to see him again.
It’s been three weeks since I’ve been back to Evan’s. A couple days after being discharged, I started seeing my new therapist, Desiree. At first, I was a bit reluctant to talk to her, but honestly, it’s been nice to talk to someone new. I got a lot of help in Ahwatukee, but there I felt like I was just another patient. With Desiree, I get her undivided attention. She doesn’t judge me for how I handled everything with Trevor. Actually, soon after I started seeing her, I found out that she went through a bout of depression after her divorce a few years back. She decided to go into counseling after all the help she was given.
“Hey, how are you doing today, Claire?” Desiree asks as we walk back toward her office. When I started coming here, I noticed how warm and welcoming this place is. It doesn’t look like any other doctor’s office I’ve ever been in before. The walls are mostly covered by bricks, but the small parts that peek through are painted a dark purple. In the middle of the waiting room sits a fireplace. I never understood why anyone needed to have such a thing in Arizona, but it does make the building look even more inviting.
“I’m actually doing pretty good,” I say as I take a seat across from her. The small room is cluttered with picture frames of her family, the walls covered with all of her certificates. She’s in her forties and, before working here, worked as an interior designer. I know she would get along great with Avery.
“Are you still taking your medication?” When I nod, she goes on. “I think you’re doing great in your recovery. I know this has all been difficult on you, but in just the few weeks we’ve been meeting, I’ve noticed a huge improvement.”
Hearing her say this makes me feel good because I really have worked hard at taking care of myself. Desiree has helped me realize that it’s okay to take time away from everything. Yes, Brady is still my first priority, but I also have to take care of myself. Evan and Avery have really stepped up to help with him. Even if I only run down to the coffee shop, it helps to keep my head clear.
“Thanks. I feel a lot better. I seem to have a lot more energy and find that I’m enjoying things a lot more now.”
“I am so glad to hear that.” Desiree smiles.
We continue to talk for the rest of my session and then we plan to meet again the next week. She tells me that after our next appointment, I’ll only need to come bi-weekly. I know that it’s a good sign, but my visits with her have become like a security blanket to me. I just hope I’m ready.
After my appointment, I decide to stop at The Espresso Bean for an iced caramel coffee. As I’m standing in line, I hear someone calling my name.
“Claire!” I turn around and am greeted by the bright smile on Sierra’s face. A smile I didn’t get to see much while in Ahwatukee. Honestly, neither one of us smiled a lot while we were there.
“Sierra!” I say, matching her enthusiasm. “How are you? You’re looking great.” I look her up and down, noticing that she has more color in her face and she’s lost a bit of weight, just since I saw her a few weeks ago.
“Thanks. My doctor recommended I join a gym to take out my stress. It seems to help and it gets me away from Auggie for a bit. I love being a mom, but it’s exhausting. Well, duh, you know that.” She smiles as she leans in to hug me. “How’s everything going for you? How’s your little guy?”
I order my coffee and then join her in a booth at the back of the shop.
“He’s really good. Getting so big. His birthday is actually next week.” I pull out my phone. “Here he is,” I say as I show her the screensaver. “He’s got a tooth coming in, so he’s been super fussy lately, but other than that, he’s at a really fun age.” I put my phone back in my purse. “How’s Auggie?”
She smiles. “He’s really good. Still getting up several times a night. I loved nursing, but I have to admit, now that I’m not, it’s so much less stressful.” She blows on her steaming coffee.
“Girl, I completely understand.” I had nursed Brady for several months and it got to be overwhelming at times. “All that matters is that he’s getting fed. You’re doing a great job.” I slurp at the rest of my drink.
“Thanks, that means a lot. Hey, Glenna is taking Auggie to meet one of her friends on Friday night. Want to hang out? I went to Ryke’s Bar with some girlfriends awhile back and I loved the live music they had there. I have to admit the owner there is pretty hot too.” She winks.
“You’re such a hussy,” I joke. I’ve never heard someone talk about their husband the way she talks about Miles. I hope that he’s able to come home soon to finally meet their son.
She laughs. “I may be married, but I’m not blind.” She sets her mug on the table and then works on the blueberry muffin in front of her. “So, what do you think? Want to go out?”
“I’d actually love to. Evan and Avery already kicked me out of the house that night. They informed me that I need to get a life.” I chuckle.
“Well, then let’s go find you a life,” Sierra jokes.
9
Claire
I stand in front of the full-length mirror in the bathroom looking at myself. I twist from side to side to make sure I look good from all angles. Since I got back to Evan’s, I’ve started gaining back some of the weight I had lost. I wasn’t heavy before, by any means, but I’m glad I’m not skin and bones anymore. I had barely recognized myself when I looked at my reflection.
Brady and I went shopping with Avery this afternoon in downtown Phoenix. She has Fridays off, which is nice, so we can spend alone time together. I love my brother, but he can be a real pain in my ass at times. Ever since I was hospitalized, our relationship has been a bit awkward. Don’t get me wrong. I know he was right for admitting me to Ahwatukee, but since then, I feel like he looks at me like I’m brittle. Like I might crack at any moment. No matter how much I’ve improved, he still treats me like I might go off the deep end if he says the wrong thing to me. I’m so sick and tired of him tiptoeing around me.
Tonigh
t, I’m wearing a new knee-length, rusty orange skirt with a black, low-cut tank-top. It’s hot as hell outside. I’m also wearing a light coat of makeup, but I’m not sure why I even bothered when I know it’ll most likely melt off my face as the night goes on.
I’m looking forward to seeing Sierra again, but I’m a little hesitant because we’re going to a bar and I’m not supposed to drink. Alcohol mixed with my antidepressant would be bad news. Plus, Desiree said it would be best that I didn’t while I’m still recovering. I’d hate to be set back because of one night of fun.
“Here’s your mama!” Avery says as she brings Brady into our room. I look at him in the mirror as I put my gold stud earrings in my ears and see that he’s been crying.
“What’s the matter, baby?” I ask as I take him from Avery. “I didn’t hear him crying.”
“He was playing and hit his head on the coffee table.” I then notice the small bruise that’s starting to develop on his forehead. At my attention, his bottom lip starts to quiver.
“Aww, baby, I’m so sorry,” I say as I kiss his ouchie. Brady’s words for it, not mine.
Over the last couple weeks, he’s been talking a lot more and it makes me so proud to see how much he’s learning.
I slide my black wedged sandals on and take Brady into the living room so I can rock him before I leave. I feel bad that Evan and Avery are always helping me out, but most of the time, they insist that I go and do something for myself.
Before everything happened, my brother thought I was a selfish bitch, but now it seems like he can’t get me out of the house fast enough. Don’t get me wrong. I spend most of my time with Brady now that I’m back.
I still haven’t found a job yet, but not for a lack of trying. I’ve applied at several daycares in the area and even a few office jobs. My brother assured me that it’s fine if I don’t work right now, but I feel completely useless. I want to be able to help them with things around their house. At least for mine and Brady’s food. I thankfully have most of my parent’s inheritance left, which I hadn’t needed to dip into until now. Even with that, Evan refuses to let me use it. He tells me that I should keep the only money I have to my name. Thank God, I had it in a separate account from mine and Trevor’s, so he didn’t have access to it.
“Hey, girl,” Sierra says as she hugs me the moment I climb out of Avery’s car. It’s so nice seeing her so carefree. She’s still the girl I met a few months ago, but she’s different in the sense that she’s much happier. I guess we both are.
“Hey, you look adorable,” I say as I grab her shoulder to spin her around so I can take in her outfit. She’s wearing a turquoise skirt paired with a yellow shirt and a white jean jacket that goes over it. She’s obviously from the desert because there’s no way in hell this midwestern girl would be wearing something like that in this weather.
“Thanks. I never get to dress cute anymore, so I decided to take advantage of our night out.” She links her arm with mine as she leads me toward the bar. Like I mentioned before, I love seeing this side of her. She has quickly become another one of my best friends and I’m grateful that I’ve had her.
The door creaks shut behind us as we enter Ryke’s. I have to admit that I’m surprised at how nice it looks inside. The outside of the building looks pretty worn down, but most of the work has been visibly invested in the interior. Every inch of every wall is covered with old record covers. I wonder if the bands on them are favorites of the owner. But with a name like Ryke, I find it hard to believe that the guy is old enough to know who half these groups are.
It’s clearly an old building, but there is a lot of pride and care put into its appearance. Each table that sits on the floor is made of black painted wood. Above each hangs a light that appears to be made from old car parts. There’s definitely a unique vibe in here.
Surprisingly, the smell is different than any other bar I’ve been to. I’m not hit with the strong, stale scent of cigarette smoke or the overbearing scent of alcohol. No, instead it smells more like the smoke from a pipe. The sweet, warm aroma engulfs me, making me want to relax instead of giving me the anxiety I’ve found lately in most social situations.
Being Friday night, all of the tables are taken, so we find two empty stools at the bar.
A young guy who appears to only be in his early twenties greets us. When we tell him we only want water, we receive an odd look from him. We both giggle as he walks away from us and we turn toward the small stage in the center of the open room.
The guitarist starts to sing. It’s a song I recognize but couldn’t tell you what it is. I’m guessing this guy isn’t much older than twenty-one. Or maybe it’s just the way he carries himself or the shaggy, unruly hair that falls to his shoulders. You can tell he really doesn’t care about his appearance, if his torn jeans and week-old scruff on his face are any indications.
His first song comes to an end and then he starts playing Uncle Kracker’s Follow Me. It doesn’t seem like that would be a song you’d hear in a bar, but it seems like anything goes here. The atmosphere is inviting, mostly because it’s very laidback.
Mr. Shaggy finishes playing and steps off stage as an older guy around my age shakes his hand and gives him a half-hug. You know, the type that guys always give each other?
Unlike the guy before, this one has my breath escaping from my lungs. He has dark, unruly hair that makes me want to run my fingers through it. Usually, I’m not a huge fan of facial hair, but his is very well kept. What the hell, Claire? I clearly haven’t gotten any in a long time if I’m letting this complete stranger affect me from only the sight of him.
His outfit consists of faded, form-fitting jeans and a button-down red, plaid shirt. A white t-shirt peaks out of the top.
He takes a seat behind the mic as he slips his guitar over his head. God, this guy is sexy.
“Hey, guys,” he starts and I feel like my panties are going to explode underneath my skirt. I’m not much for sex toys, but tonight it would probably be good to have one because I’m acting like a freaking horny teenager right now.
“Have you enjoyed all the music tonight?” The crowd hoots and hollers. Once everyone finally settles down, he continues. “I’m glad.” He smirks. “I don’t usually play, but I’ve had a few requests tonight, so what the hell, right?”
“That’s Ryke, the owner,” Sierra whisper yells as she leans into me. “Isn’t he hot?”
I don’t answer but instead continue to look straight ahead, waiting for him to play.
The crowd goes wild again, but when he strums the guitar, all that’s heard is him. At least, for me.
As soon as he starts strumming on the guitar, I know exactly what song it is.
I wish you would step out from that ledge my friend,
You cut ties with all the lies, that you’ve been living in.
And if you do not want to see me again, I would understand.
I would understand
His voice is incredible. Manly, but smooth as silk at the same time.
Again, not a song I expected to hear, but I’ve always been a fan of Third Eye Blind. Hearing it takes me back to junior high when all I had to worry about was if Johnny Filmore liked me or what color I wanted my braces to be for the month. Maybe that’s why I’ve always liked music like this. Because it reminds me of a simpler time.
He finishes the song and then all of time seems to stand still. At first, I’m sure that he’s staring at someone behind me, but then I realize that he is looking right at me. Suddenly, it feels like I’m in this building alone with this stranger. Very sexy stranger. The bar isn’t big, by any means, so we’re only about twenty feet from where he’s playing. He grins at me and then starts to play again. Nobody else seems to be affected by him like I am. Sierra doesn’t even realize the moment we just had. You have lost your damn mind!
I really should go outside for some fresh air. I start to stand from my seat, but I’m quickly frozen in place when I hear the lyrics to the next song. Chills ru
n down my spine.
Hey, where did we go
Days when the rains came?
Down in the hollow
Playing a new game
Laughing and a-running, hey, hey
Skipping and a-jumping
In the misty morning fog with our,
Our hearts a-thumping
And you, my brown-eyed girl
You, my brown-eyed girl
A ridiculous part of me wants to believe that he’s singing this about me, but there’s no way he can even see what color my eyes are. Yes, we’re not far from each other, but it’s still dark in here.
I haven’t even consumed any alcohol tonight, but I seem to be drunk. I really need to get out of here.
“Hey, you okay?” Sierra asks as I stand up. “You’re not leaving, are you?”
Now I feel bad because this is supposed to be a fun night out for her as well and I’m trying to bail on her.
“No, I just really need to pee.” I head toward the bathroom and when I enter, I splash cold water on my face.
I don’t know what’s come over me, but I’ve never let any man, besides Trevor, affect me like this. I’m not sure I like it. The last time I opened myself up to someone, he ruined me.
Claire, all he did was look at you and sing a song about your eyes. He did NOT propose!
Once I’m done giving myself a pep talk, I decide to head back out to visit with Sierra. I wonder if she has any idea what that Ryke guy just did to me. Of course, she doesn’t because he didn’t do anything besides play a couple songs while sounding sexy as sin.
“Woah, sorry.” This comes from a rough, masculine voice that is accompanied by a strong hand on my arm.
I look up at the mysterious person to see the most gorgeous set of ocean blue eyes I’ve ever seen. I’m not even exaggerating. His eyes alone could be my undoing.